From an optimistic POV you could say I someone who lives in interesting times. I call it Upside-Down Land.  Like everyone, I am trapped between a selfish gene and a selfish soul. I suspect this world was created by a gangster-god.  It treats this world as a private casino where the house wins every day and most players lose.  Hope and faith serve as liquor in this universal casino.  The gangster-god enjoys all the upside of this duality platform for consciousness, but suffers little or nothing of the downside.  It is a parasite, and you are its host.